Okay, title is a bit of a joke. lol Body betrayed me this week. Anxiety is a bitch. So strange how much control your mind actually has over your body. After my chest stopped imploding Sunday, I was gifted excruciating neck pain radiating from the base of my skull into my scalp and behind my eye. This has been ongoing for, let’s see, it’s Wednesday… so four days now. It finally crossed the boundary into migraine level pain yesterday. Soooo cool.
Sometimes when I get super emo I crave anything just to feel a little alive – I regret these thoughts lol. Nothing more alive than being in pain for days on end! Also skipped my period due to all the stress, which is a pro? or a con? Who knows, but that also causes more anxiety and stress, love how cyclical that logic is…
It’s baffling. I’m eating way better, taking vitamins/meds diligently, and exercising 4-5x a week. Okay, maybe I self-harm a little, but WTH do you want from me Body? I swear the universe loves to troll me because the minute I start to feel a little bit better emotionally, I get a stiff reminder that life-is-pain. Did I not get enough of that lesson already? What am I missing.
Whatever, I can handle physical pain (emotional pain is worse lol). I can find ways to power through and get some work done. Time to stop whining and in the words of Morty – get my shit together. “Get it together, Summer!”. Need to put on a better face than this one. hahaha
Time for sleep and water and drugs. Not in that order.