Here I go. down the drain. I felt nothing… Just cut to see how it would feel… Felt strangely good after. Want to do it more. I don’t feel human so it’s okay. Now just thinking about the pain of continuing to live. I know I should just give up.. but it’s hard. I just want my parts to get what they want.. and .. rn … that’s for me to stop their suffering… by any means necessary.